Banging My Head Against The Wall!

We have an appointment tomorrow with Paige's Paediatrician, and not a moment too soon! There are several things I need to discuss with him.  First and foremost its her behaviour at dinner time!  She will sit on her seat but then when it comes to actually eating anything she starts to whinge and she wants to sit on my lap to eat.  Today at MIL's house for lunch she started doing it again and when I laid down the law and said no, she started crying even  more.  So Mr Soft Touch Rob goes to the rescue and was going to pick her up and put her on his lap!!

I got so angry!! Its HIS fault that she has started wanting to do this all the time because we started having this problem months ago and he would pick her up and put her on his lap and thats how she eats her dinner, but enough is enough!!  Now she has gotten used to this bad habit and Im the one who has to pick up the pieces and be the bad guy again by saying no, she has to sit on her chair.

He doesnt realise the damage he has done cos now I think she thinks that this is how we eat our dinner, well its not!! Sure, if she doesnt want to eat, then fine, she doesnt have to sit at the table but I wont pick her up and put her on my lap anymore!  Another time, she was crying and carrying on to get out of bed one Saturday morning and I told him not to go and get her.  I get up to go to the toilet and what do I find when I get back to bed? Paige!  He says he doesnt like to hear the girls cry, but that isnt a reason to be soft!  Ive told him time and time again, parenting is a partnership,  but the way he is going, he is doing all the wrong things and now I have to be the one who enforces the rules, he just wont discipline her!

Then he wonders why the hell I get angry with him! Well Duh! Its so frustrating, cos we definitiely arent on the same page when it comes to parenting and discipline.  Its been happening ever since she was a baby!  Id put her down for a nap and after a couple of minutes she'd start to whinge,  not cry, just whinge and he would go running to her and pick her up out of bed.  If I try to discipline her he will say "Oh mummy is mean isnt she?" She is getting mixed messages here! I just feel like Im banging my head against the proveribial brick wall, because what ever I do, he will do the exact opposite!!! Nnnngggnnnggggg!

Sorry about the bitching and moaning again, it seems like all I do around here lately, but when I mention anything he starts to get all defensive and say I blame him all the time, well, its his fault to begin with! My MIL and FIL even agreed with me today and said that its spoiling her if he gives in to her demands.  He doesnt understand its attention seeking behaviour!